Fucking Ouch!

Kinda broke my ear a little with a cotton stick..
.. and I have a flight tonight.. Fun.


In the tv show Sex and the City, the character Carrie Bradshaw write about disasters. Going to a fancy bar in NYC and the date didn't show up. Disaster.
They guy you started liking happened to have a small penis. Disaster.
I disagree.

At 1 am this morning, when we were all sound asleep, a ferry in Zanzibar sank, and took hundreds of people with it.
There were over 500 people on board and 260 are missing, 60 of those are children. 100 people have been recued so far, and the rest have been found dead. The strong ocean winds made it so difficult to recover bodies, so that they have been washed up on scores around the island.
Thousands of relatives are now waiting for news about their loved ones.

That's a disaster.


Actually.. its 11/9, but since the americans are a bit backwards, they put it the wrong way.
Like on their ID cards, it would 12-02-1989 for my birthday, which in any other country would indicate that I am born on the 12th of february, which I am not =P
Anyway, terror terror. Everyone seems to think that something terrible will happen today, 10 years after the big attack in NYC. And why wouldn't it? Terrible things happen everyday. People kill each other all the time. People even kill themselves. In my opinion, the thing that made is such an historical attack was because the two magnicifent buildings went down. Of course, I am not saying that I don't think that the whole thing was extremely tragic. I do. But I don't think that it's more tragic than what happens in Africa right now, or what happens everyday in other countries. The widows and children don't mourn their dads more just because they are american.

It's like that missing girl, Madeleine McCann. That must be the most known case of kidnaping. And, poor her, if she is still alive. 
People put candles in their windows, sign lists online to show "support". There were TVshows about her, radio, in every magazine and newspaper. On every airport, there are picture of her. Every facebook status changed into something to with her. That is because she is a white, american girl. And we could all see a happy, smiling cute girl on pictures. It's good that people become concerned, and that they show humanity and support. That is one girl. One foundation. 
Go to Thailand. Go to Cambodia. Children from the age of 4 to 14 are being kidnapped every single day there, and sold to precious, white american and european men. Not one word is ever mentioned about those children. Is it too much to take in for the normal person? Do we look away from the things that are too horrible for us?
One missing american girl might be all we can actually comprehend.

It's not a bad PR trick though. Hysterical tabloids.  "Awaiting anniveristy attacks!"
Who wouldn't be worried? Ten years after World Trade Center, who wouldn't buy those newspapers?

In two weeks..


Danger could be my middle name, but its John.

Change is good.

Here is a picture from when Rob was here. The only one I have because I can't find my phone =P

Anyway.. Gonna start looking at Stockholm flights today. My dear mother said she could buy be a ticket home, as an early birthday gift =D it won't be too expensive. Plus, im not planning on living there for the rest of my life anyway. I'm getting my arse back to England in a few months. After christmas, maybe. Or earlier, or never. With me, you'll never know. ;)

Breakfast in bed with hamster urine.

Breakfast in bed have been looking better.  Dry Kelloggs Bran Flakes from the box.. yum.

My head hurts, lack of sleep. The damn weather kept me up all night. Thank you english storm. 

I need to clean out Wallowizzard and Derp's cage today, they fucking stink.. I don't even know why I have these creatures here, beside my bed. They are cute and all, but sort of useless. 
I told Pete to return them to the store, since he won't take care of them, and I didn't even buy them. 
Also, with me moving, I won't be able to take care of them.. But then I thought.. They belong together, our little fag-hamsters. And if we give them back to the store, they would probably not be sold together the next time. Can't do that to them, that would be heartbreaking.
So, stinking hamsters it is. Maybe I can take them to Stockholm? I have never heard of a hamster passport if I am honest.


If I ever needed you, it's now. Now that I am lost, now that I need to be found.
I wish I had known you. I wish I had shown you. All of the things I was on the inside. I wish I could have stood where you would have been proud, that wont happen now.
There is a whole lot of singing thats never gonna be heard, disappearing every day without so much as a word.
I dont have to answer any of these questions, I dont have a guide to teach me these lessons. 

I wish I had known you.
I wish I had shown you..
.. all of the things I was on the inside.
Everyone is singing, we just want to be heard. Want to grab a hold of my little songbird, take him for a ride to the top of the world, somehow.


I wished I was smarter 
Wished I was stronger
I wish I would have stood
Where you would've been proud
That won't happen now
There's a whole lot of singing
That's never gonna be heard
Disappearing every day
Without so much as a word
I think I broke the wings
Off that little songbird
And he's never gonna fly 
To the top of the world Now
To the top of the world
You think you broke the wings
Off this little songbird 
And she's never gonna fly 
To the top of the world now
I wish I'd know you. Wish.. I'd shown you. All of the thing I was on the inside.
Everyone is singing, we just want to be heard, but disappearing everyday without so much a word, how?
I want to grab a hold of that little songbird, take him for a ride to the top of the world, right now.